Thursday, July 2, 2009

The 10 Greatest Movie Badasses Of All Time

It's impossible to become a badass. If you're a badass, you come out of the womb with a gun in your hand, permanent five o'clock shadow and a thirst for blood, not milk. A badass spends their entire life killing punks, causing massive explosions wherever they go and making the world a safer place for us non-badasses. They're also really useful to have around if you're wating for a table at Denny's.


#10 Charles Bronson (Any Charles Bronson Movie) - There are certain people who aren't that big or strong, but you can tell just by looking at them that they're one bad ass motherfu*ker. That's Charles Bronson.




#9 Marv (Sin City) - Marv can withstand multiple gunshot wounds (including shots to the head), being hit by a car, taking a blow to the head by a sledgehammer and the inital shock of the electric chair. If that's not a badass, I don't know what is.




#8 Snake Plissken (Escape From New York/LA) - The former U.S. Army Lieutent served under Special Forces Unit Black Flight with two Purple Hearts and he the youngest soldier to be decorated by the U.S. President for bravery during campaigns in Leningrad and Siberia in World War III against the USSR ... which has even happened yet. All that stuff is great and all, but the eyepatch is Snake's true badass selling point.




#7 John McClane (Die Hard 1-4) - The man simply can't be killed. You could set John McClane on fire, shoot him 37 times and he'd still find a way to comeback and kill you and your family.



#6 Bruce Lee (Every Bruce Lee Movie) - The greatest martial artist ever that was such a badass that many people believe the Chinese Triad secrelty murdered him with a secret mixture of marijuana and pain killers.




#5 Maximus (Gladiator) - Rome's finest warriors and tigers were no match for Maximus. It's just a shame he couldn't live long enough to have sex with Connie Nielsen. Man she was hot in that movie.



#4 Conan The Barbarian - The "Warrior Gladiator King" loved to crush his enemies, see them driven before him ... and he really loves to hear the lamentation of their women. I don't even know what lamentation means, but it sounds pretty badass.

#3 King Leonidas (300) - If it weren't for those Persian pussies with their coward bow and arrows, King Leonidas would've defeated Xerxes army of one million soldiers. He also had a smoking hot wife who was great at badass Spartan sex.




#2 Rambo
- For crying out loud, the man is capable of defeating an entire country by himself. Rambo is such a badass that when he shoots people he doesn't just kill them, he makes their entire body explode.




#1 Dirty Harry - Dirty Harry is the original movie badass with the most badass one-liners in movie history. Inspector Callahan also made the Smith & Wesson Model 29 revolver, chambered for the powerful .44 Magnum cartridge popular which is something I think we can all be thankful for.


http://www.manofest.com/Content/the-10-greatest-movie-badasses-of-all-time.html

No comments:

Post a Comment